Apologies

I know, I know. I've been slacking with the blog posts. In all honesty, I haven't had anything to write about of late nor the motivation to dig something up.

I've been working at NHSBT for nearly 2 months now and I'm amazed at how fast the it's gone while annoyed at how little I've achieved outside of work. I guess this is to be expected though, getting used to the structure a new job creates alongside the new knowledge and skills I've had to gain really takes its toll mentally and physically. This is especially difficult when half the shifts start at 5am, an unearthly hour that never existed before the start of 2013. All I can say, is thank heavens for naps. In all honesty, I quite enjoy going to bed at 8pm of an evening. It's not like there's anything good on TV these days anyway (you wouldn't think I was only 21 would you?).

I'm slowly bringing my life around to where I want it. I've started eating properly again and the exercise will follow soon. I have a good job with good career prospects and the voluntary work for St John Ambulance will begin in the near future. Opposite the building I work in is an Ambulance Service Operations Center where the HART Paramedics (Hazardous Area Response Team) are based. I heard a rumour that we may be able to go over and talk to the guys to see what they get up to. I will attempt to find out more I think, this sounds like an exciting opportunity. Yes, that does mean the burning desire to be a Paramedic is still there, it really isn't a passing fling, this one is gonna stick with me for a long time. That's a good thing though, as I will have to take the long road. It's okay, I'm feeling positive.

Now, I feel it's my duty to do a little preaching here. As I work for the National Blood Service, and regularly give blood, I'm gonna pester you lot to do the same. We're in constant need of new donors and it literally takes half an hour to give a unit of blood. Ever thought of how being a Doctor and saving lives would be cool? Well, you CAN save a life without even applying for a medical degree or getting your stethoscope out. Go on, try it. Give blood.

I also just wanted to point out that my friend Stacie was recently on TV and in the Newspaper for the "From the Heart" campaign in a bid to raise awareness of organ transplantation. She's really quite inspiring and hopefully a read of this article will encourage you to at least think about becoming an organ donor. It takes seconds! You can also see her on ITV News/Daybreak in the video on her blog.

That's all from me today, I'm probably gonna go sleep now. I have a sore throat.

Over the Moon

At last! I've had some luck thrown my way. I have just received a Job offer as Healthcare Technical Officer within the NHS Blood & Transplant and I'm over the moon! I will be working at Filton Blood Centre, which is the largest blood bank in the world and supplies blood to most of the hospitals within the UK. Quite an amazing place, even if it is built on a flood plain.

I had a tour around the place when I went for my interview, and it's surprisingly efficient and very much like a factory as opposed to a lab environment. I thought I'd share a few pictures to give an insight into the life saving work I'll be doing daily (at unearthly hours in the morning).

The modern new building I shall be working in (geograph.org.uk)

I'm not sure I'll ever get used to holding bags of peoples blood...  (davidhedgesphotography.com)

The whole place is set out in little pods and it's unbelievably well run. I also get to wear a ridiculous cap and special shoes. (davidhedgesphotography.com)

After being spun in a centrifuge (blood cells are pulled to the bottom while plasma sits on top), they squeeze out the plasma in these machines leaving just blood. Note the very attractive uniform! Working here definately gives you a taste of what people would look like bald. (davidhedgesphotography.com)

I believe here they are mixing the blood cells with a special saline solution so that they last for longer (BBC News)

Finally, this link takes you to a short BBC News video and shows some of what goes on inside the manufacturing hall.

From what I have gathered so far, I will be doing some form of testing. Not what I originally wanted, but I think it will be just as good as the other roles within the centre.

So it looks like I may have been saved from working at Royal Mail after all...

Have a good Weekend,

Phil.

To Uni, or Not to Uni? That is the Question.

I am lacking the motivation to post anything of any great intelligence or thought here at the moment. I have been rummaging around and a few tentative ideas for posts have cropped up but they need more research and all of my energy is currently aimed at finding a job (or 'moping around' as one might call it).

A midst all of this though, I have been tossing about the idea of returning to University next year to just get on with my Paramedic Sciences degree. Fueled by several Paramedic blogs I have recently come across on the internet, my desire to get into this job is just getting stronger and stronger. I really am not sure what is driving me towards this, or if I will even be able to cope with the immense responsibility that stands on the incredibly wide shoulders of emergency care practitioners (I am working on a post that goes into detail on some of the issues that Paramedics and EMT's have to deal with).

This is such a huge decision in my life, I'm really not sure what to do right now. I almost want to just 'wait and see' but things like this don't wait around. The deadline for University applications falls in mid January, meaning that I need to complete an extensive UCAS application before then, including references and a well drafted personal statement. I'm wondering if this effort will be worth it, just to decide come August that I want to put off my (second) degree for X number of years. At the moment I think a main worry is the financial commitment. I will be paying more for this 2 year foundation degree than I paid for my 3 year undergraduate degree!

After believing that it's no longer possible to 'third man' with an Ambulance crew anymore, I had given up on the hope of gaining any experience of what it might be like to carry out a role in pre-hospital care. However, I have been informed by a friend that it is still possible within some Ambulance trusts! I have begun contacting some to see if there is a possibility of doing this. I will wait and see the outcome of this before making a firm decision on the University front. It's just difficult to see a future through the 'fog' at the moment. I think I need to change my perspective and stop trying to long term plan, just get on with it. The danger is though, that I end up stuck. It happens all the time. People apply for an office job to see them through temporarily, ten years and thirty five lbs later they're still sat at the same desk with the same intentions they've always had and no plans to put these into action. I will not be one of these!

This process of becoming a Paramedic is going to take longer than I had ever previously imagined. It's difficult to be proactive, with very little to do in the mean time.

My CRB check has come back clear from St John Ambulance, meaning that I should be able to book myself onto the training sessions required. Unfortunately, I may not be able to attend my weekly group meetings. It all rests on how well my Job Interview went that I'm waiting to hear about. That's the same reason this post is being done so late tonight, so I'm not tempted to imprint my whinging onto the internet tomorrow if I get rejected!

On a final note, I have been watching Kevin McCloud's Man Made Home on Channel 4. Quite inspiring. I've even caught myself looking at land prices...

For another week perhaps, over and out.

Them Damn Butterflys Again!

It's that tight feeling in my stomach again. That horrible knot, twisting at my insides telling me to run away and hide. Oh I would love to run away and hide, but sadly I have to attend this interview. I'm half an hour early with nothing to do but sit and think of the upcoming interrogation and how stupid I'll make myself look. I should have stayed in bed a bit longer.

In all seriousness, I think we all go into things like this thinking of how stupid we might look or saying the wrong thing. As it turns out, this probably makes us more likely to fall over a chair or accidentally tell them about the time you got fired for eating all the cream cakes in the bakery. I think the key to nailing any job interview is confidence and enthusiasm, but this requires a calm mind. I wish that damn knot would go away! Maybe one of my beta blockers will help...

Writing that only took up three minutes. What do I do with the other 27? I should probably sit and think about how I can put a positive spin on my weaknesses (not sure how you make being rubbish at everything particularly positive!). I really dislike the whole interview culture. They ask the same old questions and look for the same answers time and time again. It's almost like learning lines for a big part in a play, but then you turn up and actually your only the under study. A lot of effort and an overall disappointingly heart breaking experience.

It may sound like I'm being down hearted and lacking the enthusiasm I mentioned was key to job interviews, but I'm not. I'm really quite positive. Maybe because this is a christmas temp job as a mail center sorter and If I don't get it, I should be put down.

Seven minutes down, 23 to go. Oh time flies when you're having fun.

On Monday, I have my second interview for a role within the NHS at Southmead Hospital. I'm really hopeful I will get one of the two positions available as there are only about 6 candidates. 1 in 3 chance, not bad huh? Especially when the only real requirements were to "be able to understand english and follow instructions". I think I may qualify, don't you?

Nine minutes have passed now. I guess I should stop writing and begin the nervous pacing around the living room for the remaining 21.

Phil

Something to Keep us all Going

I realise that finding a Job is going to be quite draining. I'll have nothing to do except for endlessly sending out my CV and looking for online application forms. I don't need to do this for three or more weeks to know that I will feel like crap pretty quickly. It'll just be one of them things that is unavoidable and I will have to find things to keep my spirits up.

This video never fails to make me smile and feel good, which is why I wanted to share it. I hope it has a similar effect on everyone else too. Oh and I recommend watching with the sound turned on, the music is pretty cool.

Excuse the title, it's not as crude as it sounds!

Artist's Website

All Is Not Lost

All is not lost, I guess.

I got a rejection from the GWAS for the Student Paramedics job. This was a bit of a bummer. Even though I knew the chances of getting it were incredibly slim, there was still a part of me that held some hope. I'm just angry that all they gave me was an automated 'good luck with your career' email and they won't give me a reason why, although I think I already know what it is. It would be nice to have some sort of confirmation.

I am going to book my C1 driving licence medical exam next week, which I have found out will cost me £120 (which is ridiculous)! Althouh I'm incredibly worried about my eyesight and the requirements. I wear glasses, and my eyesight is fine with them - but the DVLA require a certain amount of vision without corrective lenses (3/60 acuity on the Snellen chart - this is basically reading the largest letter on the chart with no glasses/contact lenses at a distance of 3m) which I really don't think I have. My prescription is about -5.5 so the vision is not so great. I don't know what I will do if I can't get this licence - I will have to give up on my dreams of being a Paramedic, the thought of which is gut wrenching.

Now I need to find something new to aim towards for the time being. God only knows what that will be.

Over and out.

Pulled my Act Together

Just a (potentially) short entry tonight as a sort of update on my last blog post.

I was feeling a bit miserable and sorry for myself when I wrote on Tuesday (was it Tuesday? This week seems to have dragged), but I have managed to pick myself up and I'm feeling much more positive. I've been keeping myself busy as much as possible, applying for jobs with avengance and sorting myself out.

I've found a Job in the NHS that I would love to do if I don't get my Student Paramedic placement and I'm midway through the application form at the moment. If I were to get it, I would become a Medical Emergency Dispatcher for the South West Ambulance Service. Although only for a year long contract, this would give me a real insight into the inner workings of the elusive Ambulance Service. However, this would mean actually answering the phone for a change - something I don't particularly like doing (who does?!).

Although I haven't ventured out far this week, I've been really getting into the Olympics! Some of you will realise this is quite strange behaviour as watching most sport is beyond me, but I've been caught shouting at the TV in some quite intense races.

I'm going to attend an information session for the Samaritans on Monday evening, something I've always considered doing but never got around to. No time like the present!

My room is now semi-tidy, ready to start packing up as I move into my new house two weeks on Sunday! I have to say, I'm really looking forward to it. It's so much nicer than the student house I currently live in. It has a nice kitchen with a dishwasher - pure luxury! The windows also act like windows in that they keep the wind out (even as I type this, my curtains are flapping about thanks to the gaping hole). The bathroom isn't mouldy and has ventilation. The list really is endless.

My exams are two weeks on Monday so I'm gonna really start to knuckle down - I think I'll be using the uni library every day as of Sunday. Be under no illusion, that really is dedication for you. Spending any more than 10 minutes in that silent, musty sauna is enough to send anyone crazy (I should know, I've spent many days and nights going delerious in that place with only the vending machine to keep me company).

Finally, I think I'm going to sell my Reading Festival ticket. I was really looking forward to going, but no longer have the money to get there and pay for everything else that weekend. I'm a bit worried it won't go as the official tickets haven't even sold out yet. I'm still hoping to maybe get a day ticket for the Saturday as my housemate is going too - I really want to see Young Guns and Florence + The Machine and The Vaccines.

Reading back over this post I've realised it just sounds like a diary! Although this blog is mainly for my benefit, I'm not sure people want to read about how I watched the Olympics and tidied my room. I will have to try and come up with something a bit more relevant next week but I have realised just how much of a long, slow process reaching my goal might really be. Luckily, time is on my side (for now).

A step backwards?

So, I'm hoping writing this will help let off a bit of steam. One of the main reasons I started this blog was to help reflect on and focus my thoughts - it's time to put that to the test.

I am well and truly fed up with looking for a job. It's not so much the joblessness, but sitting around all day is mind numbing! Although I have taken to watching friends back to back all day which offers a bit of relief! At the moment, I can take comfort in the fact my housemates are in the same boat but next week one of them leaves so that's one less person to keep me sane!

I got another job rejection from the NHS today. It was the job I seemed most qualified for (annoyingly, it required no official qualifications so my degree clearly counts for nothing!) and my hopes for the others have dropped, but only time will tell. I imagine I will hear back sometime in the near future.

I've been looking at volunteering opportunities in the mean time. I've sent out a few emails, mainly for environmental work but it seems everyone is on Holiday at the moment! Tried to contact some people about becoming a community first responder but within the NHS they only do it in remote communities. I live in the middle of Bristol - go figure. Will have to see what turns up!

I am taking this time to start some form of exercise routine - something I've been meaning to do for a long time.

So not much of a step backwards in reality, but it feels like it. I suppose I should think of it more as side step.

Well, luckily I ran out of inspiration before I ranted too much. I will probably write again before the weeks out with a more coherent post (Friends is too distracting!).

P.s. Just watched the Friends Finale! How could they even THINK of ending the show?!